I just want this hell to end.

I found this when I was cleaning my room. I wrote it long time ago...Its been so long I hardly remember what I was thinking at the time..


I'm sick of this shit
I'm sick of my scars
I dont know why you pretend
What you say is never the reality

You use me to be comforted
You use me to boast
I cant comprehend why you care so much
Why do you think you have to impress me?

At times I find myself thinking
about the way things used to be.
But the strange thing is..
I don't care. I just don't care anymore.

You people can have my past.
My angry, jelous, hurtful past
I cant go back.
I wont go back.

Im finally going in a straight line
Trying hard not to curve or bend
The wounds you've left me
still clench a nerve

I just cant forget
the memorys of the past
They'll haunt me forever
if you keep ending up in my path.

The only way to find my sanity
is to leave and never look back
But thats just not possible
Im not that strong

I have to make a big decision
It will alter my life
Do I want to free myself?
Do I want to be hurting forever?

I wish I could see
into the future
Then the answers would be simple
Crystal clear

Whatever happens
The way we are will never change
You will always be connected to my past
I'll never forget.

I just want this hell to end.